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Cause and effect: 15 Minutes in the toilet - Daniel Olakunle



A curious theme right? Yeah, actually it is. The advent of the economic recession has actually caused a lot of curious scenarios. These scenarios are quite funny if you think about them. I mean, why would a person spend up to fifteen minutes in a toilet? Well, maybe if the toilet is neat enough or fitted with technology meant to be enjoyed while dropping your er... Stones, maybe you could spend up to one hour there. But no, I am talking about Awo toilet; the annex precisely. Alright, let's talk about the Cause and the Effect that was written on the headline.
Okay, imagine if you normally buy two sachets of 'pure' water (50cl each) before the recession began with any meal you take. Mark it- any meal. Now recession began and you found that you had to conserve, especially after the Ose-Igberaga (3weeks max). You now take 1 sachet per meal or half, while you keep the other half for the next meal. The recession becomes a Cause. For people who visit the toilet once a day like me, the next day would be stressful.
Alright, what happens at last is that, you have a hard time of it getting the bolus outta ya system. You keep pushing and the thing refuse to come out because it is stone hard, stemming from not taking enough water to help irrigate the plants and/or animals you ate yesterday. So, the toilet becomes a labour room where others are waiting their turns to grunt. Little by little, 3 minutes turn to 10 to 15. When at last you get out, the sweat on your body is enough to be water for the next meal (only God knows where those came from). You try flushing with Omi Omole and your baby won't leave you alone. The next person screamed and you come out, you rush out and the next thing you hear is a sad groan that you have 'despoiled' the toilet. You tell the person that you met the toilet quite dirty too, that you had to flush before you could use it in the first place; that was why your little water couldn't do the rest.
So, the first effect is that; you spend fifteen minutes groaning in the toilet. The other problem is that, you found out that you are getting late for class. You got to class and you had to lie your way out of the situation. Another effect (for a person who like to be truthful like myself), cumulating from the first. The other will quickly say, you feel seriously thirsty, since you sweated the remaining water from your body, you now try to do less work to conserve the little water you've got in your body.
Well, the lists go on and on. I'm quite tired now self, another thing is, when you smell a bad odour and you feel the urge to spit, you quickly remember you need to conserve water.
Buhari, Buhari, this Change is hard o...

(C) El'Shazzar
Twitter: @daniels1olak

Instagram: el.shazzar

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